How do I apologize to my partner?

Concerns & risks

You were trying to fix things after a mistake, but your apology made your partner even angrier.

Bad apologies make it worse.

Causes & evidence

Take responsibility without excuses. See conflict communication.

What to do

1. Say what you did.
2. Acknowledge how it hurt.
3. Say what you'll do differently.

Common mistakes: Common mistakes: saying 'I'm sorry you feel that way' or adding 'but.' A real apology names what you did, acknowledges how it affected them, and says what you'll do differently. Listen to their response without defending yourself. Give them time. Follow through with changed behavior. Don't expect instant forgiveness; it's their choice and timeline. Avoid over-explaining your reasons, which can sound like excuses. Ask, 'Is there anything else you need from me to make this right?' Then show change over time, since actions mean more than words. If the same mistake keeps happening, look at what's behind it, and consider talking to a counselor about it.

Speed Man tip: Repair attempts matter.

Wrap-up: Own it. Acknowledge. Change.