Is jealousy normal in a relationship?

Concerns & risks

You were trying to understand your feelings when your partner talks to an ex, but you feel jealous and wonder if that's normal.

Some jealousy is human; control isn't.

Causes & evidence

Occasional feelings are normal; controlling behavior is not. See healthy relationship signs.

What to do

1. Talk about feelings.
2. Watch for control.
3. Seek support if it escalates.

Common mistakes: Common mistakes: acting on jealousy by snooping or accusing. Feeling occasional jealousy is common. Notice what's behind it, like insecurity or past hurt. Talk about it calmly. Jealousy becomes a problem when it leads to control, like restricting who someone can see. Ask yourself whether the feeling comes from something your partner did, or from fears you've carried from past relationships. Share what would help you feel secure, like an introduction to the friend, and ask what they need too. If your partner's jealousy makes you feel monitored or restricted, that's a sign to pay attention to. Counselors can help with long-standing jealousy.

Speed Man tip: Trust is key. If you feel unsafe, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-7233).

Wrap-up: Feelings ok. Control not. Talk.